Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Wobbly Faith. BIG God.

I have struggled. I have prayed. I have cried. I have prayed. I have wrestled. I have prayed. I have knocked. I have prayed. All in the name of ministry. No one told me stepping out in this radical calling would be so hard and take everything I have. Oh the passion that consumes my soul. The lives of so many young girls hang in the balance. They need hope. They need healing. They need Jesus.


And I wanted to know WHY. Why aren’t these visions you gave me happening? Why are other ministries growing while I feel like I am constantly taking two steps forward only to fall again. Why Lord?


And through that still small voice I heard the Lord speak.
 “Amanda, how old is Broken Within? (It will be a year old next month Lord, so 11 months?) “Right, and what is an 11 month old able to do? Are they able to walk? Run? Speak? Some do, yes. But most are just learning to walk. Most wobble as they take those first few steps. They see the prize on the other side and they want with everything inside them to get to that goal, and so they stand and take a few wobbly steps only to fall again. But they get back up and try again with so much excitement you think they would burst.  Sure there is frustration in not being able to run and get to the prize quicker. But the process of learning to walk is sometimes more important than the goal.

And the same is true with you my child. I notice every wobbly step of faith you take. And I beam with proudness. I know that you want to start running and someday you will be able too. But right now allow me to help you learn to walk in this calling. Allow me to hold your hand and lead you to where you need to go. Allow yourself and this ministry to mature in My timing and trust that I birthed this ministry inside of you and I will bring it to completion. "

Ah. What a sweet and precious moment with My Jesus. I am sure people on the highway thought I was crazy with tears streaming down my face. I didn’t care. My Jesus was there. He was real. He hadn’t forgotten me. He hadn’t overlooked me. He hadn’t ignored my pleas. He wasn’t mad at me for doubting. He had come. He had spoken right into the depths of my soul. And I was ever so grateful.


The Lord has done such incredible things through Broken Within these past 11 months and I have literally watched this baby of mine grow. There have been times of sheer exhaustion.  Times of wishing someone else would lighten my load. So I could just rest. Times of rushing through those precious “baby” moments to get to the bigger stuff. Oh but how I yearn to cherish the “in the moment” with my “toddler”.


By watching God’s love encourage so many young girls. Seeing real and authentic friendships being born. Allowing God’s hope and healing transform lives. It’s not about me or the things I have done or will do in this ministry.


It’s about JESUS. It’s all about Him.



 And there is also YOU.


 I have known from the time God “conceived” BWM in my soul. That this ministry was never to be a one woman show. That I could never do the things God was calling me to do alone. I needed like-minded women to link arms with me and God has been so faithful to send those women my way. BWM has welcomed writers, mentors and prayer partners on our team. And what a treasure you are to me. Thank you for your willingness to serve and make a difference in the lives of precious young girls.


But I also know that not everyone is called to write, speak, mentor or pray for this ministry but I do believe that everyone has a place in this beautiful community and I want to give you an opportunity to invest if you feel called to do so.


Up to this point I have avoided asking for financial help for Broken Within projects. Until the Lord made it clear it’s not about money. It’s about linking arms and giving YOU your place in this ministry. And It’s about Real lives. Lives of precious young girls who so desperately need the healing and hope of Jesus.



And in this season of Broken Within there are two (wobbly) steps of faith the Lord is calling me to.


1st: To step out and start a Teen MOPS program in the Triad. This will be the first Teen MOPS program in the Triad and the second in the state of NC. The need is so great and as a former Teen Mom it is an honor to step out and pour into the lives of these precious young moms and encourage and equip them to take their place as mothers who pour into their children with the love of Jesus. But in order to do that they first have to be poured into. It will take a team of passionate women to run this program. But the first step I need to take is to purchase the curriculum and pay for the charter fee.

 2nd To attend the She Speaks Conference in July. I have known about this conference for a few years, but never felt called to attend until this year. This is a season of growth for me and this ministry. There is so much I have yet to learn about this calling. So much to learn about investing, teaching, speaking and writing so that I can be better equipped to pour into the precious young girls God places in my life. It would be such an honor and blessing to attend this conference and receive all that God has in store for me as I sit in His presence.


And to be able to take those first steps toward these two callings. I will need to raise a total of
$ 1,324.

·        $400 for the Teen MOPS curriculum and charter fee.

·        $ 925 for the She Speaks Conference( Includes Hotel, Pre Conference/Conference materials and Meals)

 ( You can learn more about these ministries in the links below.)


If you would like to link arms with me and invest in Broken Within in this way you can do so here:

And know that YOU are so incredibly vital to me and the lives of so many young girls that will be blessed by your gift. I can’t even begin to describe the impact your gift will have in this ministry and from the bottom of my heart; I want to say THANK YOU for choosing to join the BWM team in this way! May God bless you!





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