Monday, March 26, 2012

Date with God...


This retreat was created for moms who have been called to Adopt, Are in the process of Adoption or have already adopted…So I went into this weekend thinking ok, I am going to learn how to be a Adoptive mom and how to best take care of the children God places in our family. And I did learn A LOT about adoption. Things I am still processing and I am sure will be future blog posts;-)...But what I wanted to share with you is what God really had in mind when He called me to this retreat…



And my prayer is that His presence is so powerfully felt through this post that you too are drawn in to be apart of this incredible experience...


When I walked into this lodge, the presence of God was so powerfully felt, I knew that there was more to this weekend than just to learn about Adoption...And so I followed Him...

I followed Him into worship and watched as all 450 women around me disappeared and it was just my Jesus and Me... And I worshiped my King from a place of raw intimate love, a love that I never really experience before. It came from a place in my heart that was so raw, so vulnerable, and so broken. But that had been hidden and locked away... And as I allowed Him access to those places of my heart, He poured out His love upon my soul in such overwhelming amounts that it literally took my breath away...


I followed Him into the conversations of the moms around me, and watched how He hand picked every single woman I would come in contact with to inspire, challenge, encourage and comfort me.

I followed Him as we walked around this amazing lake together and He spoke to me throughout nature. Reminding me of who He was and how creative He is and how much He cares about each and every detail of His Creations...


I followed Him in so many ways over the course of this weekend, but there is one time, that I didn't follow Him, but instead He waited for me to arrive...


There was this special event called a "Date with God" and you signed up for your special time and then show up for your "date"...And so I eagerly went not knowing what to expect...

And I will never forget what I experienced as I walked into that room... There He stood waiting anxiously for me to arrive...My Beautiful King...And He took me by my arm and escorted me into His presence and His love...

He first led me to the painting station and He asked me to paint the image that He sees when He looks at me, I painted a sun and a bride dressed in white...He then lead me to the station where there was tons of pillows and I just crawled up in His lap and just rested...I allowed Him for the first time in a long time to hold me, rock me, comfort me, sing over me, caress my hair and wipe away my tears. In that moment there was no agenda, no responsibilities. All my other titles disappeared and I was just His child and He was my Daddy. He began to show me that He brought me to this retreat to uncover all those locked away hurts...The hurts of isolation, abandonment, anger, bitterness, fear and neglect...And that He wasn't uncovering all this to bring about more pain, but to remind me what it felt like to be an orphan child in desperate need of someone to Adopt me...

And He was my daddy who loved me so much that He went to the gates of Hell to bring me into His family not because of what I could do for Him but because of this incredible love He has for me and couldn't fathom the thought of ever living without me...

He IS my Beautiful King, My Daddy, and the Father to the Fatherless, and oh how I love Him so...

* Sweet friends, PLEASE don't skip over listening to this song! It is so beautiful, so intimate, so powerful, And I promise, you don't want to miss it!*